SIGforum.com    Main Page  Hop To Forum Categories  What's Your Deal!    School Dress Codes
Page 1 2 3 
Go
New
Find
Notify
Tools
Reply
  
School Dress Codes Login/Join 
אַרְיֵה
Picture of V-Tail
posted Hide Post
Sounds like you are a good parent, sir. You have the V-Tail stamp of approval.



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
 
Posts: 30545 | Location: Central Florida, Orlando area | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Spread the Disease
Picture of flesheatingvirus
posted Hide Post
Despite the fact that it sounds like she may have been in technical violation of a strict interpretation of the bare backs section, I can't freaking stand how most dress codes include a statement like:

"...and anything else that disrupts the educational process"

Or something like that. It can be interpreted to cover ANYTHING the bureaucrats don't approve of at the time. I've been singled out by that sort of crap when I was in high school. Regardless, their response was totally overkill and a huge waste of everyone's time.


________________________________________

-- Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. --
 
Posts: 17248 | Location: New Mexico | Registered: October 14, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by flesheatingvirus:
Despite the fact that it sounds like she may have been in technical violation of a strict interpretation of the bare backs section, I can't freaking stand how most dress codes include a statement like:

"...and anything else that disrupts the educational process"

Or something like that. It can be interpreted to cover ANYTHING the bureaucrats don't approve of at the time. I've been singled out by that sort of crap when I was in high school. Regardless, their response was totally overkill and a huge waste of everyone's time.


What is sad is most of this is directed towards girls because for some reason boys cannot focus if they see an inch of bare skin, cleavage or God forbid a bra strap. Yes, I get that all teenage boys are constantly horny and if this wind shifts it can case them to sport wood but this isn't the girls fault and it is not sending a good message to anyone.
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Savor the limelight
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
quote:
Originally posted by trapper189:
quote:
Originally posted by mod29:
Was she actually breaking the school's dress code?


I'm fairly sure the answer is yes, but it's ok because she was only breaking it a little bit, the people in charge are douches, all the other kids break the rules as well, and the rules are stupid. Confused


And the award for the super snarky and overly pissy replay goes to Trapper who has won the right to STFU unless he knows what he is talking about.

To clarify: The rules on "exposed skin" are very vague and up to staff discretion. I assure you, if she was breaking a rule she would not ave worn that to school and she had worn it on numerous occasions. Additionally the rules clearly state that clothing with vulgar or suggestive language is not allowed, hence my point on the polo shirt.

I am the first person who will call their own kids out for not doing the right thing but also the same parent who will not blindly tell his kids to respect adults when they act like idiots and are on power trips


I'm sorry. In breaking down what you wrote to the bare essentials, I was snarky and I should not have been.

I spent seven months this year long term subbing at my kids' school for fun. I have dealt first hand with parents and read your post through that filter. Through that filter, your post shares the common themes I wrote with what I've heard all year and your response adds another one: my kid has been doing this all year and not been in trouble before. Your daughter being talked to rudely and the staff member's shirt are valid reasons to be upset. I'm not trying to be snarky, pissy or rude, but the rest sounds like someone trying to get out of a speeding ticket.

I was expected to enforce the dress code at my kids' school. For example:

1. Right color and type of shirt, shorts, or pants is easy.

2. No bare backs or shirts/dresses without sleeves also easy. Nothing vague, technical or strict there.

3. Skirts and dresses no shorter than so many inches from the wearers finger tips with the wearers arms naturally at her sides or whatever the standard was. Yes, that's technical and there was absolutely no chance I was getting out a tape measure to enforce it.

4. No tight fitting pants. Vague and subjective as all get out. And again, no chance I'm walking up to a student and telling them his or her pants are too tight.

Yes, the dress codes are unfairly imposed on female students because of the males students.

As a contrast:
My daughter wore a dress to school on a spirit day that was deemed inappropriate. I drove home and got her a sweater to wear that covered her shoulders. I spent two minutes in friendly conversation with an administrator.
 
Posts: 10824 | Location: SWFL | Registered: October 10, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by trapper189:
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
quote:
Originally posted by trapper189:
quote:
Originally posted by mod29:
Was she actually breaking the school's dress code?


I'm fairly sure the answer is yes, but it's ok because she was only breaking it a little bit, the people in charge are douches, all the other kids break the rules as well, and the rules are stupid. Confused


And the award for the super snarky and overly pissy replay goes to Trapper who has won the right to STFU unless he knows what he is talking about.

To clarify: The rules on "exposed skin" are very vague and up to staff discretion. I assure you, if she was breaking a rule she would not ave worn that to school and she had worn it on numerous occasions. Additionally the rules clearly state that clothing with vulgar or suggestive language is not allowed, hence my point on the polo shirt.

I am the first person who will call their own kids out for not doing the right thing but also the same parent who will not blindly tell his kids to respect adults when they act like idiots and are on power trips


I'm sorry. In breaking down what you wrote to the bare essentials, I was snarky and I should not have been.

I spent seven months this year long term subbing at my kids' school for fun. I have dealt first hand with parents and read your post through that filter. Through that filter, your post shares the common themes I wrote with what I've heard all year and your response adds another one: my kid has been doing this all year and not been in trouble before. Your daughter being talked to rudely and the staff member's shirt are valid reasons to be upset. I'm not trying to be snarky, pissy or rude, but the rest sounds like someone trying to get out of a speeding ticket.

I was expected to enforce the dress code at my kids' school. For example:

1. Right color and type of shirt, shorts, or pants is easy.

2. No bare backs or shirts/dresses without sleeves also easy. Nothing vague, technical or strict there.

3. Skirts and dresses no shorter than so many inches from the wearers finger tips with the wearers arms naturally at her sides or whatever the standard was. Yes, that's technical and there was absolutely no chance I was getting out a tape measure to enforce it.

4. No tight fitting pants. Vague and subjective as all get out. And again, no chance I'm walking up to a student and telling them his or her pants are too tight.

Yes, the dress codes are unfairly imposed on female students because of the males students.

As a contrast:
My daughter wore a dress to school on a spirit day that was deemed inappropriate. I drove home and got her a sweater to wear that covered her shoulders. I spent two minutes in friendly conversation with an administrator.


Apology appreciated and accepted...sorry if I jumped down you throat
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of rtquig
posted Hide Post
Here is my observation on Dress Codes from the past 3 years of substitute teacher in 3 high school districts:
In schools that are more strict with their dress codes and enforce the codes and other rules such a discipline, the school runs well and both students and facility are more happy and the learning process goes smoother.
In schools that have a dress code that no one enforces because administration does not back teachers in enforcement because they do not want to deal with the parents phone calls, there is more chaos. Teachers don't enforce the rules knowing that nothing will be done and they stop trying to be that good teacher and the students suffer in the end.
When I have to turn away because I can see everything below the waist on a teen age girl wearing a dress and don't dare say anything as you will be called a sex offender by the student and parents, there is a problem here. I have been advised by both male and female teachers to look the other way and don't say anything for fear of being fired. It's not going to get better.


Living the Dream
 
Posts: 4011 | Location: New Jersey | Registered: December 06, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Banned
posted Hide Post
If the dress codes made sense, and most of them don't, I could see them helping, but most of the ones I've seen that friend's kids have had to follow are just silly. The hoodie ban that they had for a while was just insane. They could wear a parka with a hood, but a hoodie was some sort of "security risk", because of the hood. WTF?. After a couple of years, they got tired of parents bitching about it and they allowed hoodies without brand logos, and of course, they had to lower the hood when they came into the building, for security reasons. I'm so glad sometimes that I don't have any kids and never have had to deal with the morons running the schools.
 
Posts: 214 | Location: Ohio | Registered: January 01, 2017Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of rtquig
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by 2010Challenger:
If the dress codes made sense, and most of them don't, I could see them helping, but most of the ones I've seen that friend's kids have had to follow are just silly. The hoodie ban that they had for a while was just insane. They could wear a parka with a hood, but a hoodie was some sort of "security risk", because of the hood. WTF?. After a couple of years, they got tired of parents bitching about it and they allowed hoodies without brand logos, and of course, they had to lower the hood when they came into the building, for security reasons. I'm so glad sometimes that I don't have any kids and never have had to deal with the morons running the schools.


In one high school that I work in hoodies are strictly not allowed in hallways as well as ball caps with a brim. I am told this is because the hallways have cameras and they want to make sure they can see the faces of students. They are not supposed to wear them in class but as the administration does not back up the teachers, the teachers feel it is a waste to write up a report that gets ignored.


Living the Dream
 
Posts: 4011 | Location: New Jersey | Registered: December 06, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Rail-less
and
Tail-less
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by cheesegrits:
quote:
Originally posted by trapper189:
quote:
Originally posted by mod29:
Was she actually breaking the school's dress code?


I'm fairly sure the answer is yes...

That's how it seems to me as well. If she's breaking the rule, then she's in the wrong, even if the rule is silly and she's only breaking it "a little." The school treating her poorly or trying to embarrass her is not acceptable.

The school official's shirt with the double entendre is irrelevant--unless it was backless or there's a rule about suggestive print on shirts.

Edited to add: FWIW, I'm female and went to a high school with a strict dress code--I sympathize with the OP's daughter. It sucks when the dress code means you can't wear a cute new dress.


So when a kid gets suspended or expelled for eating his poptart into the shape of a gun, or liking a instagram post of a gun when home and not at school, it's fine because those are the rules? People on hear bitch and moan about school rules and zero tolerance stances on anything gun related but dress codes are totally different? Give me a break. It's called common fuckin sense. These fucktards spend more time enforcing assinine rules then they do educating students.


_______________________________________________
Use thumb-size bullets to create fist-size holes.
 
Posts: 13190 | Location: Charlotte, NC | Registered: May 07, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
safe & sound
Picture of a1abdj
posted Hide Post
One of my friends has a teenager in a local high school with very small lockers. They have a rule saying no winter coats, as there is nowhere to store them.

How does a bus rider stay warm waiting for the bus in the middle of winter?


________________________



www.zykansafe.com
 
Posts: 15695 | Location: St. Charles, MO, USA | Registered: September 22, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
His diet consists of black
coffee, and sarcasm.
Picture of egregore
posted Hide Post
quote:
They have a rule saying no winter coats ...

That's even goofier than the OP's situation.
 
Posts: 27835 | Location: Johnson City/Elizabethton, TN | Registered: April 28, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Savor the limelight
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Dusty78:

So when a kid gets suspended or expelled for eating his poptart into the shape of a gun, or liking a instagram post of a gun when home and not at school, it's fine because those are the rules? People on hear bitch and moan about school rules and zero tolerance stances on anything gun related but dress codes are totally different? Give me a break. It's called common fuckin sense. These fucktards spend more time enforcing assinine rules then they do educating students.


Threatening Kevmo's daughter with suspension for her dress code violation was and is asinine.

The Student Handbook for my kids' school spells out what happens for dress code violations. Everyone gets a copy at the beginning of the year and both parents and students sign a paper saying they have read it and agree to follow it. The handbook is only 30 pages or so and doesn't have any public school ZT BS in it.

For dress code violations at my kids' school, the student is asked to fix the issue, or stay in the office until someone brings appropriate clothing. The staff enforces it, the administration backs them up, and amazingly enough, there are very few problems. My daughter was sent to the office because the dress she had on for 50s day during spirit week didn't have sleeves. I went home and got a sweater for her. Was it an inconvenience?: yes. Did any of my kids violate the dress code for the rest of the year?: no.

On the other hand, had my daughter not been treated respectfully or threatened with suspension, either the Head of School or the Assistant Head of School would get an earful.
 
Posts: 10824 | Location: SWFL | Registered: October 10, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
quarter MOA visionary
Picture of smschulz
posted Hide Post
Hard to believe that one needs to get so worked up over a dress code. Confused
 
Posts: 22858 | Location: Houston, TX | Registered: June 11, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
quote:
Originally posted by SigMaverick:
Then why isn't she going to wear it to school again?

Your daughter knows she has a dad who isn't likely to back down, so she has been emboldened to stretch rules, knowing that the likelihood of her being punished is lower than all the rest of the kids with pushover moms.

But it's the admins fault they didn't know who her dad was, right?


Jesus Effing Christ...please read my replay above before you start getting pissy with me!!!

And to answer your question, the reason she isn't wearing it to school again is two fold:

1) The code does have a language about bare backs and midriffs but is very vague and that was their way of saving face but asking her not to wear it again.

2) My daughter is an A student, active on campus and does a ton of volunteer work however she has been diagnosed with severe anxiety and is subject to panic attacks. 2 years ago she had to be home schooled because she was unable to leave the house at times. She has worked her ass off in therapy and by pushing her comfort level to the point where she has been in 2 school plays, a dance recital and volunteers at Planned Parenthood every Sunday. As a rule we try to avoid things whenever possible that could trigger and attack and getting needlessly bitched at by a self righteous blowhard falls into that category.

To those who get it and support me I thank you and for those who feel the need to leave pissy comments I ask you read all my posts before you start judging me


No good deed goes unpunished. I think you handled it well. Life is hard enough for these kids in high school.

All I can say is if I were back in school, I would get all the "ions"--suspensions, detentions, infractions. And then some.



I should be tall and rich too; That ain't gonna happen either
 
Posts: 358 | Location: NW NJ | Registered: December 07, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Thank you
Very little
Picture of HRK
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by smschulz:
Hard to believe that one needs to get so worked up over a dress code. Confused


It's not about the dress code, its about how an infraction was handled, the abusive tactics of the administration, if it happened the way it was explained, and a parent protecting a child from those administrators abusing children and the rules.

Threatening expulsion or suspension for a minor dress code violation is unwarranted, a clear abuse of power, when a simple call to the parents to bring up to code clothing, or in this case a sweater would have been sufficient to remedy the situation.

As to the conversation with the student a warning as to how she violated the code and to not do it again would be sufficient.



 
Posts: 23244 | Location: Florida | Registered: November 07, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of iron chef
posted Hide Post
This story is making the rounds now. TL;DR version: dress code violation leads to student insubordination accusation leads to principal office visit leads to 10-day suspension. That escalated quickly.

Dress code, series of events lead to honor roll student's suspension

HARRISBURG, N.C. -- A senior at Hickory Ridge High School worries her college future is in jeopardy, and it's all stemming from a shirt she wore.

On Wednesday, Summer wore a green shirt that rests just off the tops of her shoulders and exposes her collarbone.

She says, while she was eating lunch, the principal approached her in the cafeteria, asking if she had a jacket.

In the suspension notice from Hickory Ridge High School, the principal and Summer apparently had an interaction where the principal told Summer to cover up with a jacket. The report states Summer responded with, "I think my shirt is fine". The principal then told Summer that her lower back was also completely exposed, so she was still not in compliance with dress code. Summer repeats again, "My shirt is fine."

Summer did not have a jacket, but a friend offered to loan her one.

"I pulled it up, put the jacket over it, zipped up the jacket," Summer says.

She says the principal told her she would have to go to the control room to change her clothes.

"I completely understand why a dress code is put into place but I feel like after I put on that jacket it should have been subdued," Summer says.

Summer says she and the principal have had a number of issues during her four years at the school. The tension has gotten so bad that her mother says she recently instructed the school administrators to call her before taking any sort disciplinary action against Summer.

Summer says, when the principal told her to go to the control room, she remained seated.

"They can't take me anywhere unless my mother is called," she says. "So I said 'I apologize, I can't go anywhere with you unless my mom is called."

That's when the situation escalated.

Summer says neither she nor the principal was able to reach her mother. The period ended and Summer accompanied dozens of her friends to the auditorium. Shortly after, she says the principal entered the room and ordered everyone to leave except for Summer.

"[The SRO] was within five feet of me, he had his hand on his gun. [The principal] said 'I'm gonna give you an ultimatum. We have tried to call your mother. You either come with me to the control room to change your shirt or we will arrest you."

Summer says she remained seated and proceeded to try to reach her mother again.

"I stayed in my seat just like a lot of role models that I have looked up to stayed in their seats," she says. 'I mean, you have to stand up for what you believe in."

Summer says the principal instructed the SRO to arrest Summer. Before he could handcuff her, her mother called back.

Summer went to the control room with the school administrators where she was given a 10-day suspension and ordered not to attend any senior activities, including graduation.

"It's just sad because I worked so hard for four years to walk across that stage," she says. "We have drug dealers walking across that stage, we have sex offenders walking across that stage and then the 4.4 student who showed her shoulders can't."

The senior is an honor roll student with a 4.4 GPA. She has a full scholarship to a major university. The official cause for suspension according to the letter sent home was "insubordination".

She says the principal is still considering expelling her.

Her mother plans to appeal.

A spokesperson for the school system refused to comment, citing student privacy, and provided a copy of the school's dress code. The dress code is lengthy and specifically, prohibits students from wearing off-the-shoulder shirts.

Earlier this school year, 45 students at Hickory Ridge High were sent to the principal's office for wearing leggings with shirts that were deemed too short.

Summer says she understands and respects the dress code, but says the fallout is a lot to shoulder.

"This is my life, I'm on a pre-med track," she says. "A full ride means so much and that is on the line right now."





I'd like to hear the principal's explanation as to what kind of insubordination lead up 10-day suspension. I think the girl is exaggerating about not graduating and losing scholarships.

The green shirt in the photo covers her shoulders. I can see how they can easily slip down to expose the shoulders, but they can just as easily be pulled up to be within compliance. I didn't see anything in the dress code quoted about exposed collar bones being prohibited.
 
Posts: 3172 | Location: Texas | Registered: June 17, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Savor the limelight
posted Hide Post
quote:
I'd like to hear the principal's explanation as to what kind of insubordination lead up 10-day suspension. I think the girl is exaggerating about not graduating and losing scholarships


The kind were Summer Snowflake talks back to the principal and openly defies the principal in a crowded room full of other snowflakes. Had Summer Snowflake acted appropriately to begin with, none of this would happen. I don't care how great her grades are or how many extracurricular activities she's in, she's getting a lesson in respect she seems to desperately need. A small infraction could have been a non-issue with a simple, straight yes sir or yes ma'am.
 
Posts: 10824 | Location: SWFL | Registered: October 10, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by trapper189:
[QUOTE]I'd like to hear the principal's explanation as to what kind of insubordination lead up 10-day suspension. I think the girl is exaggerating about not graduating and losing scholarships


The kind were Summer Snowflake talks back to the principal and openly defies the principal in a crowded room full of other snowflakes. Had Summer Snowflake acted appropriately to begin with, none of this would happen. I don't care how great her grades are or how many extracurricular activities she's in, she's getting a lesson in respect she seems to desperately need. A small infraction could have been a non-issue with a simple, straight yes sir or yes ma'am.[/QUOTE

There are deeper things at play on this one....If she is in a situation where her mom needs to be called before she is disciplined there has got to be some kind of history or trail.
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
Uniforms... Problem solved.

I had a uniform for grades 1-8 and a pretty strict dress code for high school (button down collared shirt, tie, sport coat, khakis or slacks, and dress shoes.) so pretty much a uniform.

I hated them at the time, but looking back on it, it was great. There was no "my stuffs better and cooler than your stuff" to contend with and there was no gray area in interpreting the dress code.


____________________
I Like Guns and stuff
 
Posts: 727 | Location: Raleigh, NC | Registered: May 15, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
quarter MOA visionary
Picture of smschulz
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by HRK:
quote:
Originally posted by smschulz:
Hard to believe that one needs to get so worked up over a dress code. Confused


It's not about the dress code.


Sorry, I must have misread the thread title. Frown
 
Posts: 22858 | Location: Houston, TX | Registered: June 11, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
  Powered by Social Strata Page 1 2 3  
 

SIGforum.com    Main Page  Hop To Forum Categories  What's Your Deal!    School Dress Codes

© SIGforum 2024