| Get my pies|
outta the oven!
We just bought a house that needs a good amount of cosmetic work and my wife asked me to get the living room done first.
I get the many cracks and dings patched and sanded, wash all the walls and ceiling with TSP. The ceiling is straight up dingy and dark, so I put good coat of Kilz Original which is very thick and oil based and takes time to put up and spatters like crazy with a roller.
I get all the prep work done and my wife is getting antsy and a little upset with me for taking "too long" in her opinion to get this done. I'm kind of a perfectionist who doesn't want to do a task unless it can be done properly and she's from the opposite side of that spectrum who just wants to "get it done" no matter how it looks.
So she has her dad come over to help me paint because apparently I'm not working fast enough. He's slapping blue tape up all loose and crooked (ARRRGH) and is just a bull with a roller, SLOPPING paint everywhere on the walls. There are sags and drips and roller marks EVERYWHERE. All the careful prep I did before, it's like none of that even matters now.
Anyone ever go through something like this? This is why I don't often ask for help and maybe that's an issue I need to overcome and not be such a perfectionist, but having to work with someone who is just slopping paint all over the place is very tough for me.
I'm on your side here, I'd rather it done right & take a little longer, than it be done sloppily.
Luckily, my wife & I are mostly on the same page here.
The Enemy's gate is down.
|It's not you,|
I hate when people try to help me with stuff like that. Especially my father in law.
Love the guy, but I have my way and he has his.
Be unpredictable at times. Only boring, dull-witted people never stray from the path. - Para
The bold lettered item is the source of the problem.
My guess is you already reached the same conclusion, but if not, that is my humbly submitted answer .
|Unapologetic Old |
Yes, I am the same way. Either do it right or not at all. And some times my wife will get upset because if I don't have time to do it right I wont do it.
You need to have a conversation with her, in the future I will not do any projects with anyone else, I don't want or need help. If you cant handle the extra time, then we wont do it at all.
- "This town reminds me of something in the bible."
- "Which part?"
- "The part right before god gets angry"
maybe her dad is just telling her in his own way he doesn't like doing this stuff, but can't say no, so he does it half assed in order to not be asked back LOL
I know a lot of guys that can do the work but won't so they don't have to do it, then go play golf...
"My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them." Winston Churchill
Just finished doing our master bath for my wife. She knows I do it my way or it will not get done. She had others help her twice in the past. She did not like how it turned out. Now, she just lets me do it my way.
You can always consider it a textured finish.
Yes...I have gone through EXACTLY what you're talking about. I'm a perfectionist just like you, and this led to MANY arguments. It literally sent me through the roof every time. First, the criticisms that it's taking too long. Then comes the hack who thinks they're going to save the day and fuck it all up.
NRA LIFE MEMBER
ISRA LIFE MEMBER
I feel your pain. Sadly both my dad and my FIL are extremely talented and capable at all sorts of home repairs and construction projects.
They just don't work the way I normally do. I'd often rather work alone.
One day I will miss having them to lean on...that's what I remind myself.
Yes, Para does appreciate humor.
The worst part is how much longer it takes to fix all of those drips and sags,after you get pissed off from looking at them for months and months.
I helped my parents flip houses when I was growing up so I know how to do a lot of home repairs, I just have to "be in the right mood" to do a project.
My husband had never even hung a picture before we got together. Right now he is attempting to paint the basement. I told him the jist of what he needed to do, then told him to watch some YouTube videos. He did come up & ask me to grab 1 of his hats because he was getting "dirty" (I assume he means paint is splattering) I really want to go check it out, but then I will tell him something he needs to do, then he'll get mad at me so I'll just wait til he's finished or comes hollering for help.
I am proud of him for attempting it, regardless of how it turns out
|His Royal Hiney|
My wife has learned there are some things that I need to finish by myself. Other things she needs to light a fire under my ass. And still other things she needs to subcontract it out.
"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946.
|34" Scale 5-String|
Do it right or don't do it at all. That's MY motto!
Regarding my father-in-law, he's not allowed within a quarter mile of anything I'm working on, for this exact reason!!!
I would loose my shit, thank God this would never happen in my case. If it did I would throw his ass out of my house and make a complete ass out of myself. Luckily my lady knows how I roll and allows my OCD to flow.
A couple SIGs and a few others
Maybe you can get PASig to post a how-to-fix painting mistakes youtube video
...let him who has no sword sell his robe and buy one. Luke 22:35-36 NAV
"Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves." Matthew 10:16 NASV
|Low Profile Member |
I would tell him thanks, I don't need that kind of 'help'.This message has been edited. Last edited by: nasig,
I hear you and sympathize. My Father always taught me that the least expensive way to accomplish a task was to spend the time to do it correctly the first time and spend the money for quality products and tools needed for the job.
So it drives me absolutely nuts to be working for someone who grew up on a farm and will spend 100 dollars in labor to "save" a nickel. What this means is that if duct tape or bailing wire will sort of work that is what you use even if that "fix" only lasts for a day or two.
I've stopped counting.
Wifey is all about the bandaid fix, I'm about doing it the right way the first time.
This is the only true problem we have in our relationship.
|Striker in waiting|
Stupid question, and yes, I'm married, but is there a "safe" way in your particular marital dynamic to tell her, "I told you so"?
That would be rewarding, but I'm guessing not possible.
I predict that there will be many suggestions and statements about the law made here, and some of them will be spectacularly wrong. - jhe888
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