SIGforum
Poor experiences with internet dating sites, buyer beware.

This topic can be found at:
https://sigforum.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/230601935/m/5370038924

September 04, 2017, 11:53 AM
james_1234
Poor experiences with internet dating sites, buyer beware.
EHarmony is where I met my wife also. Met her 10/11 years ago and have been married for 7 years. Take your time on your profile, and be honest about yourself and you will do good there.
September 04, 2017, 12:30 PM
joatmonv
I was on a few of them years ago and like Skins, plenty of stories both good and bad.
Worst one was the stalker after I ended it with her. Had to threaten legal action to make her stop. That's when I quit the online dating thing.
Take your time, have fun but be ready to run like a scalded dog after you have a feeling about someone.


I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not.
September 04, 2017, 12:32 PM
jimmy123x
quote:
Originally posted by preten2b:
Not yet. I was thinking it was next but wanted to know more. Anyone have experience there?


Each area of the country is different.

I did eharmony. You have to answer like 700 questions to set up your profile. Here's what I've found, the women are SOOOOO picky, that they look for 1 single item in your profile to rule you out. It's like they're looking for damn near any reason NOT to date someone, versus at all the positives.

I'm currently on Zoosk and would rate it as pretty good, a good amount of matches, the website works well, etc. It seems to be one of the top dating sites now.

Match- I was on for many years. But a year or two ago when I was last on it, there were tons of fake profiles and other BS with the site to deal with. If someone reports your email, they don't even read it (match), they instantly give you a warning and a second time they block you and keep your money.

Women get into the habit of thinking the next guy is going to be better than you (the current guy they're on a date with) and get pickier and pickier....because hey, they're getting new emails a day.....and free entertainment...... but every once in a while, you find the 1 you click with.
September 04, 2017, 02:23 PM
preten2b
Even in a comparatively short time dating. I've had some laughable experiences, thankfully nothing scary. I do think it's tougher at this age (61). If I were 75, perhaps I wouldn't care much. If I were 40 I'd feel like there was plenty of time to be choosy. Instead for the first time, I have this biological clock ticking that the women are changing fast at 55-63, and I'll be changing every few years as well. 5 years from now would bring a big difference.

I honestly feel the % of ladies at this age who are less motivated and too strongly "opinionated", is very high. Sometimes I just want to blurt our "you girls know George Clooney is taken, right?"


------------------
The plural of anecdote is not data. -Frank Kotsonis
September 04, 2017, 03:22 PM
tanksoldier
Met my wife on matchmaker.com

Don't know if it still exists.

quote:
"you girls know George Clooney is taken, right?"


They wouldn't like him either.



"I am a Soldier. I fight where I'm told and I win where I fight."
GEN George S. Patton, Jr.
September 04, 2017, 03:26 PM
YooperSigs
Gentlemen:
I am a battle scarred veteran of on line dating. Pretty much tried them all. POF, Match, EHarmony, and a few I cant recall. Most of my dates were 45+ years old and had kids. I have had quite a few bad experiences. Here is the one that most amused the local cops:
Broke up with chick after it dawned on me she was a hard core, unrepentant alcoholic. When the usual crazed chick tactic of venomous e-mails, letters and phone calls failed, she showed up in the parking lot of my townhouse complex completely shit faced and dressed in a harem girl outfit. She then did the Dance of the Seven Veils out in the lot. The neighbors were delighted. My landlord less so. The cops thought it was hilarious.
And the crazed chick all time winner was actually a Psychologist!
My advice to those of you want to try on line dating:
Burner phone. Never give out your primary phone number. And a dating only e-mail address.
No invitations to your home until the fifth date.
Research, Research, Research. Don't take what your date is telling you at face value. Check out her history, job, finances, family, kids and Ex anything. She is single after kids and other relationships. Why?
Listen carefully when she speaks of past relationships.
Look carefully at her living conditions. House and car filthy? Flee!
Pets will give you some insight too.
The questions she will ask you give you a great deal of insight. If she is very interested in your financials, run fast and far. As men age, their value often increases. Women, not so much.
Does this all sound like a lot of work? It is! But very necessary. And this applies to any dating site you choose.
I leave you with words of wisdom from my father:
"Never lie down with anyone crazier than you are".
And yes, there are still lots of great single women out there. Its just that finding them is a bitch.


End of Earth: 2 Miles
Upper Peninsula: 4 Miles
September 04, 2017, 03:51 PM
Patrick-SP2022
I had tried the online dating thing when I was in my early 40s.
Chatted with a few.
Dated one women for a bit.

There were only two problems with this.
1. My looks.
2. My personality.

I don't have the temperament for this kind of silliness.

Others obviously have had good fortune with these sites.

I wound up meeting my wife on the commuter train. We celebrated our 10th anniversary a few months ago. Smile




September 04, 2017, 04:18 PM
lkdr1989
Soooo...you're saying get a train pass? That might be cheaper than borrowing niece/nephew and/or a friend's dog Big Grin

quote:
Originally posted by Patrick-SP2022:
I had tried the online dating thing when I was in my early 40s.
Chatted with a few.
Dated one women for a bit.

There were only two problems with this.
1. My looks.
2. My personality.

I don't have the temperament for this kind of silliness.

Others obviously have had good fortune with these sites.

I wound up meeting my wife on the commuter train. We celebrated our 10th anniversary a few months ago. Smile





...let him who has no sword sell his robe and buy one. Luke 22:35-36 NAV

"Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves." Matthew 10:16 NASV
September 04, 2017, 04:57 PM
akcopnfbks
Well I'll share since everyone else is doing it....met my wife an an adult hook-up site (hint: it begins with "adult" and ends with "finder".....the middle word is "friend"). Wasn't looking for anything except sex. No expectations, no bullshit, just sex. She knocked my socks off (literally and figuratively).....not only was the sex amazing (and it still is), we clicked instantly. That was a little over 12 years ago. I dunno what it's like now on aff, but it might be worth a shot....maybe the lowering of expectations helps at least take the pressure off?


_________________________
"Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than omnipotent moral busybodies" ~ C.S. Lewis

September 04, 2017, 05:06 PM
arcwelder
quote:
Originally posted by preten2b:
Not yet. I was thinking it was next but wanted to know more. Anyone have experience there?


I tried Match.com, didn't have any luck even meeting anyone in person. I tried Eharmony, and got laid a bunch but still didn't find "the one."

I met my wife in college, just didn't marry her til 12 years later. Long story.


Arc.
______________________________
"Like a bitter weed, I'm a bad seed"- Johnny Cash
"I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel." - Pee Wee Herman
Rode hard, put away wet. RIP JHM
"You're a junkyard dog." - Lupe Flores. RIP

September 04, 2017, 05:31 PM
rscalzo
Try a Antifa rally. Those girls are hot..




Richard Scalzo
Epping, NH

http://www.bigeastakitarescue.net
September 04, 2017, 05:53 PM
RogueJSK
quote:
Originally posted by YooperSigs:
I leave you with words of wisdom from my father:
"Never lie down with anyone crazier than you are".


The more modern (though less polite) version of that advice given to guys of my generation is: "Don't stick it in the crazy!"
September 04, 2017, 09:56 PM
dewhorse
I tried eharmony....it said I had no matches....really!

Stuck with strippers and bar tenders until I went to Ukraine for work....we have been married for 10 years this January
September 05, 2017, 11:16 AM
rainman64
quote:
Originally posted by dewhorse:
I tried eharmony....it said I had no matches....really!

Stuck with strippers and bar tenders until I went to Ukraine for work....we have been married for 10 years this January


Love those eastern euro women.
I, like Arc, tried eHarmony. Same experience.
I now call it ePimp.

I met Raingirl on a blind date, by some friends. You just never know where it will be found.....


___________________
"He who is without oil, shall throw the first rod"
Compressions 9.5:1
September 05, 2017, 12:24 PM
V-Tail
Check CraigsList. There are some interesting ads. Wink



הרחפת שלי מלאה בצלופחים
September 05, 2017, 01:25 PM
9mmepiphany
quote:
Broke up with chick after it dawned on me she was a hard core, unrepentant alcoholic. When the usual crazed chick tactic of venomous e-mails, letters and phone calls failed, she showed up in the parking lot of my townhouse complex completely shit faced and dressed in a harem girl outfit. She then did the Dance of the Seven Veils out in the lot. The neighbors were delighted. My landlord less so. The cops thought it was hilarious.

As an officer who has responded to calls like this...thank you for the entertainment




No, Daoism isn't a religion



September 05, 2017, 01:54 PM
BurtonRW
FWIW, my SIL and now-BIL met on eHarmony. Married for 8 years now w/ 3 kids.

-Rob




I predict that there will be many suggestions and statements about the law made here, and some of them will be spectacularly wrong. - jhe888

A=A
September 05, 2017, 04:43 PM
GWbiker
quote:
Originally posted by dewhorse:
I tried eharmony....it said I had no matches....really!

Stuck with strippers and bar tenders until I went to Ukraine for work....we have been married for 10 years this January


I had a friend who worked in Russia setting up factory equipment for the Ruskies.

He told me that Russian women are desperate for available marriage minded American men.


*********
"Some people are alive today because it's against the law to kill them".
September 05, 2017, 06:59 PM
Lefty Sig
quote:
Originally posted by GWbiker:
quote:
Originally posted by dewhorse:
I tried eharmony....it said I had no matches....really!

Stuck with strippers and bar tenders until I went to Ukraine for work....we have been married for 10 years this January


I had a friend who worked in Russia setting up factory equipment for the Ruskies.

He told me that Russian women are desperate for available marriage minded American men.


This is sort of true in various countries where it would be a major life improvement to move to the US. However, some girls have gotten smart and some know how long to be married (and preferably in a state with the most liberal community property laws). Before they can divorce and get a big payout. Pre-nups are essential with international marriages.

Also, remember that a girl who is less desirable in her home country, and thus looking for a way out, may find she has much better opportunities after she becomes an American citizen. If she's looking to get out of her home country by marriage, she already has a very pragmatic mindset and may be willing to settle for whomever will get her here, without a long term plan to stay with him.
September 06, 2017, 07:36 AM
btanchors
I met my wife via a singles ad I placed in a local paper. There was no World Wide Web then, much less dating sites. We're still together married, over 30 years later.

But there was one who responded to my ad before the one that came to be my wife. She was from West Virginia. I went out with her once. The date was OK, not great, but not too bad, so I went out with her a second time. About an hour or so into the second date, I realized this was a mistake, we really have nothing in common. We finished the date, and I stopped calling her.

She started calling me, and leaving me messages asking me to call her. After leaving several messages, I decided I am going to have to call her back and tell her the truth, and that while she was really nice, I didn't feel any chemistry and did not want to continue seeing her. She seemed to take that pretty nicely on the phone.

That night, I had another message on my answering machine. It was NOT her, but it was her mother. I never met the mother, but I KNOW it was her mother. Very heavy, older West Virginia accent. I will quote directly, because it scared me to death and I remember the exact words: "You low down liar! You are going to pay for this! And Buster, don't you think you're not!"

I lived alone and was scared to death, at the time had no firearms to defend myself with. I had no idea what I was dealing with and was afraid someone was going to come to my house with a shotgun. Nothing ever happened beyond that, though. It could be because my phone number, although she had it, was unlisted, so she couldn't look up my address in the phone book and find out where I lived (remember no WWW at that time).

Fast forward to now. We have a close female family friend - Divorced, 56 years old, 4 kids, and her youngest just left the nest, so she is dating again. She's been meeting people via dating sites. We hear the stories, and the only thing I think of is thank god I am married, I would never fit into the dating scene today.