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I work in a toxic environment and it seems like the majority of people in the office will stab you in the back if they think it will benefit them. I am starting to notice it even with people I would consider work friends.

One of the bigger problems that has made this place toxic is our manager encourages people to go around their supervisors and come straight to him. This drives me crazy believing that there should be a chain of command.

I am naive in thinking this can be fixed? Should I think about a finding a different job?

Thanks,

This message has been edited. Last edited by: dar185,




"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." Thomas Jefferson


"All that is necessary for evil to triumph is that good men have insurance." JALLEN
 
Posts: 808 | Location: PDX | Registered: December 28, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Run




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Posts: 9119 | Location: TN | Registered: December 18, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Man of few words

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dar,

I know that feeling as I live it every day at work. I've learned to only trust a few people and still am very careful around them because one of the guys I trusted stabbed me in the back recently about something trivial. At least I know where I stand with him.

I would say try and stay above the fray and keep to yourself. Only you can know if you should look elsewhere. As far as can it be fixed? Absolutely. Will it be? Probably not. My place is a 100 year old manufacturing plant and the way things are are ingrained in the place and will never change.
 
Posts: 7324 | Location: NE Ohio | Registered: July 03, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Posts: 14510 | Location: Loudoun County, Virginia | Registered: December 27, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Separation of business and pleasure. My work colleagues have little to no idea of who I am or what I do off the clock. People you work with and for are not your friends. Makes it harder for them to stab you
 
Posts: 427 | Registered: November 07, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Should I think about a finding a different job?

Vote with your feet.
 
Posts: 22433 | Location: Johnson City/Elizabethton, TN | Registered: April 28, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
His Royal Hiney
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If you got people working under you, you can support the manager by saying the manager has an "open door" policy and You also have an "open door" policy as well. If they have a problem, they should come to you first.

You tell your manager that it's great that he'll let people come to him directly but how about getting your manager to announce that he wants people to go through their supervisor first. Otherwise, what the hell is he paying you the big bucks for?



"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946.
 
Posts: 15554 | Location: Bay Area, CA | Registered: March 24, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Been out of the business/management for quite a while. I guess I was fortunate to have had a long and successful career in a company that was well managed and while all of us managers had that "open door" policy, we all encouraged the people to use the chain of command.

Workplace relationships/friendships can prove to be a double edged sword!

Having friends work for a manager is asking for trouble. Even if there is not some reliance on that friendship, it is very likely to be perceived that the manager is favoring that friend.

I have always operated on the concept that if you asked me a question, I gave you the best answer I had. Served me pretty well throughout my career. Even told a 4th line manager that he screwed up big time. He had!! It was a personnel issue involving an employee who had charged 4 days of rental car cost (used the car for personal use) to his expense account.

A couple years later, that 4th line manager told me that he knew if he asked me a question I would give him the best answer I had. Long story, but it ended up with a great relationship between us.

"special" relationships between employees and managers can never be hidden, and will lead to morale issues which can/will lead to performance problems.


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Posts: 24560 | Location: Virginia | Registered: December 16, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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It's work and stays that way. Everyone is out for themselves lest I forget that.


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Posts: 11750 | Location: Bottom of Lake Washington | Registered: March 06, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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You don't really know toxic until you work in government, where sexual harassment "victims" are compensated with cash and promotions, convict informant's statements given credence over officers, and overt racism against whites is rampant. Keep to yourself, document everything, and remember, at work, you have no friends. Or run.
 
Posts: 14951 | Location: Lexington, KY | Registered: October 15, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by dar185:

I am naive in thinking this can be fixed? Should I think about a finding a different job?



YES AND YES!
I work in the most toxic of the toxic. I'm blessed to work remotely but this type of shit happens because people allow it it. Mostly upper management or in small businesses, ownership. The owner of my company is a miserable fuck and the only semblance of control he has is to berate and treat the office staff like shit.

The paycheck is good, but I've got a foot out the door.




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Posts: 8654 | Location: Orlando, Florida | Registered: July 12, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by oldbill123:
Separation of business and pleasure. My work colleagues have little to no idea of who I am or what I do off the clock. People you work with and for are not your friends. Makes it harder for them to stab you


^^^This. I hate that, but learned it the hard way. Repeatedly...




Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.
 
Posts: 11802 | Location: Downeast Maine | Registered: March 10, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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That's a toxic work culture there. Something like that can only be fixed from the top. If the people at the top don't fix it, that means they condone it.


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Posts: 10194 | Location: Central Florida | Registered: March 12, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Management by intimidation.


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Don't let your mental health suffer. Time to look for another job, like yesterday.


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Posts: 18214 | Location: TEXAS | Registered: September 04, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
W07VH5
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This is probably much easier to fix than with quitting. Just don't trust anyone, mark those that you've seen act childishly and intimidate then, mark those you can use to your advantage and act friendly to them, make the supervisor feel like your superior and always praise the manager behind his back.
 
Posts: 41433 | Location: Pennsyltucky | Registered: December 05, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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This is why I look forward to retirement. I can barely tolerate BS in my private life. At work, even less. But the workplace in most cases is built on pure BS and politics. I need money so I hold my nose and keep on swimming. First opportunity to get the fuck out and you won't even get a goodbye from me I'll be gone so fast.......


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Posts: 525 | Registered: July 20, 2018Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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I used to think some of the people I worked with were my friends. We fished, shot together, and would go out to eat. People pretend to be your friend, then you find out they are stabbing you in the back while stepping over you.

After I retired, I went to work a few days a week in the Vocational School District. I'm friendly to people but they have no clue who I am or what I do outside work.


Living the Dream
 
Posts: 3312 | Location: New Jersey | Registered: December 06, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Honky Lips
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I'm exceptionally reserved with work colleagues, that said there are a handful who I do consider friends, but they've proven their friendship.

thinking about it they're all Vets too.




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Posts: 7969 | Location: Live from the high desert and the great American southwest! | Registered: July 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Thank you for the great advice. I was off the last three weeks and had a great time. My euphoria wore off in the first 20 minutes back. Time to start looking for something else...




"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." Thomas Jefferson


"All that is necessary for evil to triumph is that good men have insurance." JALLEN
 
Posts: 808 | Location: PDX | Registered: December 28, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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