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Limp handshakes. It tells me you don't give a crap. Login/Join 
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Picture of arcwelder76
posted
I'm not sure what people think about handshakes these days, but maybe I'm old fashioned.

Generally speaking, I'd call a firm handshake respectful. In any transaction, it also says "I am pleased, and thank you."

If you're a lady, or identify as non male, you should still try to shake hands like you're awake.

I can't stand "the dead hand" or whatever you'd like to call it.

I'm not advocating for giving everyone a bone crushing death grip, that's not actually polite either.

But dang, if I wanted to shake hands with a corpse, I'd dig one up. Or go over Bill Cosby's house.


Arc.
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"Like a bitter weed, I'm a bad seed"- Johnny Cash

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Rode hard, put away wet. RIP JHM

"You're a junkyard dog." - Lupe Flores. RIP

 
Posts: 24586 | Location: Love that dirty water, oh | Registered: June 09, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
I'm Fine
Picture of SBrooks
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I agree. Both limp fish and bone-crushing are annoying.

People hear "firm" and think it means as hard as I can squeeze ?


------------------
SBrooks
 
Posts: 2951 | Location: East Tennessee | Registered: August 21, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Hillbilly Wannabe
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So what do you advise me to do? I've just had wrist surgery and a firm handshake is to be avoided .
I have been going into my whole carpal tunnel spiel but it is getting tiresome. And sounds likes whining.( it is, I'm a baby I admit.)
Maybe just a quick peck on each cheek? Big Grin
 
Posts: 2185 | Location: Georgia | Registered: July 12, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Posts: 2859 | Location: west 'by god' virginia | Registered: May 30, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
On the DL
Picture of V-Tail
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quote:
Originally posted by 9x18:
So what do you advise me to do? I've just had wrist surgery and a firm handshake is to be avoided .
I have been going into my whole carpal tunnel spiel but it is getting tiresome. And sounds likes whining.( it is, I'm a baby I admit.)
Maybe just a quick peck on each cheek? Big Grin
Yeah, when I read Arc's original post in this thread I thought about the period when I was released from the hospital after being hit with Guillain Barré Syndrome.

My hands were so weak that I actually had to ask people for help at the gas station -- I could not twist the cap off to fuel my car. I could not open jars in the kitchen. Couldn't load a magazine, even had trouble with squeezing a trigger.

It took months of physical therapy and exercise. Two and a half years later, I have probably recovered 80% to 90% of my previous hand strength.



A mind is a terrible thing.
 
Posts: 18385 | Location: Central Florida (near Orlando) | Registered: January 03, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Drill Here, Drill Now
Picture of tatortodd
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Tells me they either don't give a shit or aren't worth a shit.



Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity

DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
 
Posts: 16118 | Location: N. Houston, TX | Registered: November 14, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Drill Here, Drill Now
Picture of tatortodd
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quote:
Originally posted by 9x18:
So what do you advise me to do? I've just had wrist surgery and a firm handshake is to be avoided .
I have been going into my whole carpal tunnel spiel but it is getting tiresome. And sounds likes whining.( it is, I'm a baby I admit.)
Maybe just a quick peck on each cheek? Big Grin
In a business situation, definitely give an explanation.

Personal situation, go for the hug, weak handed fist bump, or just give a reminder of your injury.



Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity

DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
 
Posts: 16118 | Location: N. Houston, TX | Registered: November 14, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Almost as Fast as a Speeding Bullet
Picture of Otto Pilot
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Ech, "The Squid".

I can handle "The Squeeze" but what drives me crazy is the "Premature Shake-ulation" where they grab your fingers and shake.

With regard to injured or less functional hands, I've gone lefty before, and if neither works, a "pleased to meet you" and polite explanation have gotten the job done.


______________________________________________
Aeronautics confers beauty and grandeur, combining art and science for those who devote themselves to it. . . . The aeronaut, free in space, sailing in the infinite, loses himself in the immense undulations of nature. He climbs, he rises, he soars, he reigns, he hurtles the proud vault of the azure sky. — Georges Besançon
 
Posts: 11053 | Location: Denver and/or The World | Registered: August 30, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
thin skin can't win
Picture of Georgeair
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Or just hold your hand up and say - "just had surgery, how are you?"

Limp is awful.

So too is the dude who thinks he's asserting his overwhelming power and masculinity crushing your hand. You're ripped, I get it. Glad to know you're also a dick.



You only have integrity once. - imprezaguy02

 
Posts: 8579 | Location: Madison, MS | Registered: December 10, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
is circumspective
Picture of vinnybass
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Don't short grip me either. I can't stand it when someone closes in around my fingers before the proper depth of engagement is achieved.
 
Posts: 4171 | Location: Las Vegas, NV. | Registered: May 30, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
The Joy Maker
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quote:
Originally posted by Will938:
If you don't become a screen writer for comedy movies, then you're an asshole.
 
Posts: 15491 | Location: Washington State | Registered: April 04, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
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It tells me they lack social skills and had poor parenting. Part of raising a son includes looking someone straight in the eye and giving a firm handshake.
 
Posts: 3455 | Location: MS GULF COAST | Registered: January 02, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of Ripley
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Worse than too limp or strong is the guy who clamps on to your fingers before your hands fully clasp. I don't know if they think it's a race or just another dominance game but I've never experienced that situation where the offender doesn't act superior. It's been a while since that's happened, even in the most casual meeting, I get my hand right in there now.


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Posts: 4921 | Location: Columbia, Illinois | Registered: December 25, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Spread the Disease
Picture of flesheatingvirus
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Lack of eye contact during a handshake bothers me, too.

It makes me wonder, "Are you going to try to stab/shoot me later?".


________________________________________

-- Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. --
 
Posts: 14258 | Location: New Mexico | Registered: October 14, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Honestly, I'd just as soon people stopped doing this. I don't like touching or being touched by other people, especially strangers. I don't hug people either, even family. Just conduct business, thank you and leave.


A Perpetual Disappointment...
 
Posts: 1962 | Registered: August 05, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
posting without pants
Picture of KevinCW
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I assume whenever I get a weak or limp handshake that that is an act of submission and that person now has placed me in charge.





Strive to live your life so when you wake up in the morning and your feet hit the floor, the devil says "Oh crap, he's up."
 
Posts: 32010 | Location: St. Louis MO | Registered: February 15, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of UTsig
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When I ran a business and interviewed for openings a limp handshake was the end. I taught this to a young man who was taking over for his Dad, he had never thought of that way to judge folks.

I complimented a youngster who is just starting out, he had a firm shake and he looked me in the eye on first meeting. He is very proud that I recognized him for it and tells me he now watches people to see what they do.


"Nature scares me" a quote by my friend Bob after a rough day at sea.
 
Posts: 2382 | Location: Utah's Dixie | Registered: January 29, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Moderator
Picture of arcwelder76
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quote:
Originally posted by wolfe 21:
Honestly, I'd just as soon people stopped doing this. I don't like touching or being touched by other people, especially strangers. I don't hug people either, even family. Just conduct business, thank you and leave.


Mmm, unfortunately this is a well dug in societal norm, and particularly in any transactional sense I'd say it'll be sticking around. I'm not a hugger either.

quote:
Originally posted by KevinCW:
I assume whenever I get a weak or limp handshake that that is an act of submission and that person now has placed me in charge.


A fair assumption.

quote:
Originally posted by V-Tail:
quote:
Originally posted by 9x18:
So what do you advise me to do? I've just had wrist surgery and a firm handshake is to be avoided .
I have been going into my whole carpal tunnel spiel but it is getting tiresome. And sounds likes whining.( it is, I'm a baby I admit.)
Maybe just a quick peck on each cheek? Big Grin
Yeah, when I read Arc's original post in this thread I thought about the period when I was released from the hospital after being hit with Guillain Barré Syndrome.

My hands were so weak that I actually had to ask people for help at the gas station -- I could not twist the cap off to fuel my car. I could not open jars in the kitchen. Couldn't load a magazine, even had trouble with squeezing a trigger.

It took months of physical therapy and exercise. Two and a half years later, I have probably recovered 80% to 90% of my previous hand strength.


Medical issues are, not an issue. I've had some hand injuries of my own, and one can't be faulted for such. No, I'm talking about people who have no excuse.

Frankly, I'd absolutely settle for someone just out and saying "I'm not comfortable shaking hands," or just about anything besides either unintentionally, or purposefully disrespecting me with a limp handshake.

People who grab the fingers, yeah they're next in line at the Guillotine.


Arc.
______________________________

"Like a bitter weed, I'm a bad seed"- Johnny Cash

"I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel." - Pee Wee Herman

Rode hard, put away wet. RIP JHM

"You're a junkyard dog." - Lupe Flores. RIP

 
Posts: 24586 | Location: Love that dirty water, oh | Registered: June 09, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by SBrooks:
I agree. Both limp fish and bone-crushing are annoying.

People hear "firm" and think it means as hard as I can squeeze ?


I don't know about you but I can always tell the difference between someone with a firm, even hard handshake and someone purposely trying to crush your hand to "impress"
 
Posts: 3411 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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posted Hide Post
A few years back, I decided to shatter my right wrist at work. Off for 6 months after the surgery (2 screws) to put my stuff back together.

I'd be damned if I was going to go "dead fish" on a handshake! In the cast and shortly after, I'd shake with my left paw, and explain "Sorry, I just shattered this one."

Never had a complaint.

As stated, a handshake should be firm, and looking into the other persons eyes.

Please don't confuse the lack of ability to deliver a firm handshake due to a physical disability or injury and the lack of testosterone it takes to shake a man's hand. Two TOTALLY different things!


_____________________________________________________________________

"When its time to shoot, shoot. Dont talk!"

“What the government is good at is collecting taxes, taking away your freedoms and killing people. It’s not good at much else.” —Author Tom Clancy
 
Posts: 5149 | Location: Just moved: Downtown Chi-Town | Registered: February 14, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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