SIGforum.com    Main Page  Hop To Forum Categories  What's Your Deal!    How difficult Is a Simple Apology
Go
New
Find
Notify
Tools
Reply
  
How difficult Is a Simple Apology Login/Join 
Member
posted
I had my house painted a few weeks ago and as part of it they were also doing my iron gate. I had recently replaced the old wood slats with new synthetic ones and as each one was different I painstakingly used the old slats as templates and match the holes...this was something I told the paint company verbally 2X and in writing once, stressing that they had to make sure the slats went back exactly as they were or they would line up.

Fast forward to painting day...instructions were ignored resulting in crooked slats and stripped screw holes.

I brought this to contractors attention and he sent over his "handyman" who replaced slats as needed but "muscle fucked" new screws in as opposed to actually measuring.

The gate looked good for a day until it slammed and 2 slats popped off reveling very elongated holes and upon closer inspection I saw that the whole this was half assed.

I contacted contractor and instead of losing my shit was patient and told him I know mistakes happen but I would like my gate fixed right and once and for all...At this point he said he wanted to send handy bot over again and I said that is fine but this is last chance and after that I want a professional brought in to which I was told "oh then just get some estimates and I will let you take care of it"

I got 3 estimates to repair/replace and the contractor said he would allow up to XXX but did not wnat to hear from me again after that...Again, staying calm I opted to replace to cover my ass.

Contractor paid gate company direct and they replaced today doing a great job. After it was all done I sent him a note telling his that I really appreciated him owning the issue and taking care of the problem.

I just got email back from contractor telling me to leave old gate in yard so he can pick up with no apology or acknowledgment of my thanks...I really do appreciate him not making me chase him but it irritates me that not once has he or his PM uttered the phrase "Im sorry" and not treated me like I am a pain in their asses.

The sad part is i was refereed to him from a neighborhood message board and people have messaged me for an opinion on using him: I dont want to hurt his rep and he did do the right thing but only after I caught him doing the wrong thing.
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
I have not yet begun
to procrastinate
posted Hide Post
If I may ask, how much $$ was the house painting?


--------
After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.
 
Posts: 3771 | Location: Central AZ | Registered: October 26, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Not really from Vienna
Picture of arfmel
posted Hide Post
Some people were never taught how to apologize. My in-laws, for instance.
 
Posts: 26852 | Location: Jerkwater, Texas | Registered: January 30, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of konata88
posted Hide Post
I can easily say superficial words of gratitude and apology at work and other non-personal settings.

Amongst friends and family and people I care about, true expressions of thanks and apology are very difficult for me. Actually, expressing any emotion verbally is difficult for me. Somehow, the sentiment of actions over words was perhaps ingrained in me.

However, in professional settings like this -- these verbals expressions can sometimes make or break you. Even if there is no sincerity behind it - it needs to get done.

I believe there is a triangle formed by product (all aspects, including quality), customer service/orientation and price (reasonableness). Start cutting any of those corners and business gets hurt.




"Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it." L.Tolstoy
"A government is just a body of people, usually, notably, ungoverned." Shepherd Book
 
Posts: 12683 | Location: In the gilded cage | Registered: December 09, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Ammoholic
Picture of Skins2881
posted Hide Post
I deal a lot in customer service. If something goes wrong a simple apology and allowing someone to vent goes a long way. It likely won't even cost any money, just the time it takes to apologize and listen to the person get it off their chest.

In your case, pay for the F-up, apologize and move on.

They skipped a step.



Jesse

Sic Semper Tyrannis
 
Posts: 20756 | Location: Loudoun County, Virginia | Registered: December 27, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by KMitch200:
If I may ask, how much $$ was the house painting?


It was just under @2000.00 and I got about 4 estimates....they were not the cheapest nor were they the most and on the painting side of things did a decent job (could have been a little cleaner)
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Equal Opportunity Mocker
Picture of slabsides45
posted Hide Post
Working with the public every day, I can tell you that an apology (or sometimes just manning up and saying "yeah, I thought x, but I was wrong. This is Y" is the only thing someone really wants.

Often it isn't about money at all. If I let them know I identify with their frustration, and make a goodwill effort to fix it to their satisfaction, they're generally very happy.

Not a hard concept to grasp, but for some I guess it's like higher math.


________________________________________________

"You cannot legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving."
-Dr. Adrian Rogers
 
Posts: 6389 | Location: Mogadishu on the Mississippi | Registered: February 26, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Spread the Disease
Picture of flesheatingvirus
posted Hide Post
I'd pull the rec and put the story out there.

Sounds like people need to watch out for this crooked guy. Folks that ONLY fix their mistakes after they are found out don't deserve your money or praise.


________________________________________

-- Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. --
 
Posts: 17244 | Location: New Mexico | Registered: October 14, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
His Royal Hiney
Picture of Rey HRH
posted Hide Post
Here's the thing. For me, actions speak louder than words. I'm just trying to read his mind here.

He did right by you. He thought you were overly picky but he wants to keep his reputation intact. So he negotiated with you and made you whole. he's out bucks that he wasn't counting on spending. What more do you want? You want him to prostate himself before you and beg your forgiveness?

And I'm not trying to argue with you. I agree "I'm sorry" would have made a difference.



"It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consist not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual." Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning, 1946.
 
Posts: 19582 | Location: The Free State of Arizona - Ditat Deus | Registered: March 24, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
The Unmanned Writer
Picture of LS1 GTO
posted Hide Post
While I agree an apology may have been warranted, an apology tends to admits fault. Admitting fault goes a long way in court when determining fault. Wink







Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.



Only in an insane world are the sane considered insane.


The memories of a man in his old age
Are the deeds of a man in his prime


 
Posts: 14020 | Location: It was Lat: 33.xxxx Lon: 44.xxxx now it's CA :( | Registered: March 22, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by LS1 GTO:
While I agree an apology may have been warranted, an apology tends to admits fault. Admitting fault goes a long way in court when determining fault. Wink


Oh it gets better...The painter stopped by this AM because he wanted old gate and sent me a snarky, passive-aggressive email insinuating that I had "unrealistic expectations"!

I replied by pointing out that absolutely none of this was my fault and added that I was a little bent that through it all I have never received a simple apology. I also mentioned that if he wan ts to point fingers he should look at his handyman and project manager that were at fault.
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
The Unmanned Writer
Picture of LS1 GTO
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
quote:
Originally posted by LS1 GTO:
While I agree an apology may have been warranted, an apology tends to admits fault. Admitting fault goes a long way in court when determining fault. Wink


Oh it gets better...The painter stopped by this AM because he wanted old gate and sent me a snarky, passive-aggressive email insinuating that I had "unrealistic expectations"!

I replied by pointing out that absolutely none of this was my fault and added that I was a little bent that through it all I have never received a simple apology. I also mentioned that if he wan ts to point fingers he should look at his handyman and project manager that were at fault.


Don't forget to include the original set of instructions which you provided.

If that person failed then the painter needs to address the issue there.







Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.



Only in an insane world are the sane considered insane.


The memories of a man in his old age
Are the deeds of a man in his prime


 
Posts: 14020 | Location: It was Lat: 33.xxxx Lon: 44.xxxx now it's CA :( | Registered: March 22, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of SIGguy229
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
quote:
Originally posted by LS1 GTO:
While I agree an apology may have been warranted, an apology tends to admits fault. Admitting fault goes a long way in court when determining fault. Wink


Oh it gets better...The painter stopped by this AM because he wanted old gate and sent me a snarky, passive-aggressive email insinuating that I had "unrealistic expectations"!

I replied by pointing out that absolutely none of this was my fault and added that I was a little bent that through it all I have never received a simple apology. I also mentioned that if he wan ts to point fingers he should look at his handyman and project manager that were at fault.


Apparently you cared more about his reputation than he did. Burn him.
 
Posts: 1721 | Location: South.....Carolina | Registered: May 25, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by SIGguy229:
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
quote:
Originally posted by LS1 GTO:
While I agree an apology may have been warranted, an apology tends to admits fault. Admitting fault goes a long way in court when determining fault. Wink


Oh it gets better...The painter stopped by this AM because he wanted old gate and sent me a snarky, passive-aggressive email insinuating that I had "unrealistic expectations"!

I replied by pointing out that absolutely none of this was my fault and added that I was a little bent that through it all I have never received a simple apology. I also mentioned that if he wan ts to point fingers he should look at his handyman and project manager that were at fault.


Apparently you cared more about his reputation than he did. Burn him.


I am not going to go out of my way to burn him BUT if asked I will be completely honest.
 
Posts: 3987 | Location: Peoria, AZ | Registered: November 07, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
A Grateful American
Picture of sigmonkey
posted Hide Post
Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.




"the meaning of life, is to give life meaning" Ani Yehudi אני יהודי Le'olam lo shuv לעולם לא שוב!
 
Posts: 43810 | Location: ...... I am thrice divorced, and I live in a van DOWN BY THE RIVER!!! (in Arkansas) | Registered: December 20, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fortified with Sleestak
Picture of thunderson
posted Hide Post
An apology and admitting fault are two completely different things and in a service industry a little compassion goes a long way.

Being honest about your experience isn't burning anyone. If ointment is needed it's because they burned themselves.

On the other hand, be aware that their inability to apologize has nothing to do with you and everything to do with their maturity level.

It costs exactly nothing to be polite.



I have the heart of a lion.......and a lifetime ban from the Toronto Zoo.- Unknown
 
Posts: 5371 | Location: Shenandoah Valley, VA | Registered: November 05, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of cparktd
posted Hide Post
I worked in residential plumbing and electrical service for ~18 years.

Callbacks cost money so you always do everything to prevent them. But regardless stuff happens.

On the rare occasion I got a callback I did it with an apology and a smile, and would make it right. It's just good business, and it will likely insure you have a customer that can trust and will depend on you for life.

If a service provider does any less than that you need a new provider.



If it ain't woke... don't fix it.
 
Posts: 4117 | Location: Middle Tennessee | Registered: February 07, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Member
Picture of mikeyspizza
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Kevmo:
people have messaged me for an opinion on using him: I dont want to hurt his rep and he did do the right thing but only after I caught him doing the wrong thing.
I would not slam him publically by posting a bad review but would privately message or email anyone who asked.
 
Posts: 4006 | Location: North Carolina | Registered: August 16, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
  Powered by Social Strata  
 

SIGforum.com    Main Page  Hop To Forum Categories  What's Your Deal!    How difficult Is a Simple Apology

© SIGforum 2024