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Stupid HR rules that are so stupid, you marvel at the stupidity of the minds of who came up with them.... Login/Join 
Unapologetic Old
School Curmudgeon
Picture of Lord Vaalic
posted
So you cant be promoted more than one level... \

So if you hire a guy in at a low level, and then he is WAY over performing at that level, and you say ok he needs to be a couple levels higher. But no, you cant do that. Cant jump two levels even though they meet all of the qualifications of the higher level. All of them. So we cant promote that person, so they quit and take all of their training with them, and then you can hire some stranger in at the higher level because they are a "new" position.

STUPID

Also raises... oh no you cant give that person a 20% raise, that's too much. But you could hire in a new guy at that 20% higher salary. WTF??? If he is doing the work then give him the money. Its totally irrelevant how much he is making now, the fact is he should be at the higher pay level, and he isn't. So we can move him into the other team where the salary range is much higher, and he will be doing the same work as the others but making 15% less because otherwise its too big of a raise... So then he refuses the transfer to the team because he isn't going to do that work for less than another 20% which is very warranted for the work that will be required. So, he declines and we hire a new asshole who sucks making 30% more than the other guy, so we are spending 10% more money on a less qualified guy.

Seriously, how does HR get dressed and out of the house in the morning?

And to be a regional manager requires 8 years in the field, 2 years in the company, and a degree. But we don't have good people, or really even bad people anymore who meet that. So lets drop the experience but keep the degree requirement. And then marvel at the new guys who are flaming out a high rate because they cant handle it. Mind you, there is no degree for what we do, so they say any degree will work, so 20 years in the field is no good but a degree in French philosophy is OK with no experience whatsoever




Don't weep for the stupid, or you will be crying all day
 
Posts: 10729 | Location: TN | Registered: December 18, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Dilbert ain't fiction, dude.
 
Posts: 17144 | Location: Lexington, KY | Registered: October 15, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Oh stewardess,
I speak jive.
Picture of 46and2
posted Hide Post
I'd just as soon choke whomever thought of the very idea, and yes, I'm quite familiar with their actual purpose.and to whom they actually serve, and detest most of them anyway.

I think a key indicator that a company has grown too large, or is mismanaged, beyond the point of diminishing returns for those who work there, is the very existence of an HR Department. I've turned down jobs just because the firm had one at all.

Not always, of course, but more often than is a good thing, that's for sure.
 
Posts: 25613 | Registered: March 12, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by Fredward:
Dilbert ain't fiction, dude.

Early in the Dilbert comic strip, he did a series about HR buying life insurance for key employees, the company being the beneficiary, the proceeds to cover the cost of replacing the dead employee.

A couple years later, the HR department at the bank I was working for attempted to do just that -- luckily, good sense prevailed, but I don't think the HR people ever understood the strong reaction on our part.

I've seen several companies reduced to ashes by bad HR policies regarding hiring, workplace rules, health insurance policies, and stuff like that.


--------------------------
Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
-- H L Mencken

I always prefer reality when I can figure out what it is.
-- JALLEN 10/18/18
 
Posts: 9158 | Location: Illinois farm country | Registered: November 15, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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They're snakes. I know their purpose and use them accordingly. They're often a roadblock to progress but occasionally act as a battering ram. Knowing the right words makes them jump.
 
Posts: 4278 | Location: Peoples Republic of Berkeley | Registered: June 12, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Oh stewardess,
I speak jive.
Picture of 46and2
posted Hide Post
They're a near perfect example of most everything that's wrong with most bureaucracies.
 
Posts: 25613 | Registered: March 12, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Telecom Ronin
Picture of dewhorse
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Yes HR can be silly and have stupid rules at times but as a person that has 50+ people working for them I love HR.

And a good HR person will help you find "work arounds" for the silliness.

HR is there for the company not the employee, as long as you remember that you will do just fine.
 
Posts: 8301 | Location: Back in NE TX ....to stay | Registered: February 12, 2004Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Unapologetic Old
School Curmudgeon
Picture of Lord Vaalic
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by dewhorse:
Yes HR can be silly and have stupid rules at times but as a person that has 50+ people working for them I love HR.

And a good HR person will help you find "work arounds" for the silliness.

HR is there for the company not the employee, as long as you remember that you will do just fine.


I don't think they are there for anyone but themselves. They exist to perpetuate their own existence, many of these policies are harmful to the company, hurt morale and create an inefficient business.




Don't weep for the stupid, or you will be crying all day
 
Posts: 10729 | Location: TN | Registered: December 18, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
I Am The Walrus
posted Hide Post
Would a work around that be to ask the old guy to resign and immediately apply so he is hired for the 20% higher position?

Reagan said: Bureaucracy is adept at protecting its nest.


_____________

 
Posts: 13110 | Registered: March 12, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by Edmond:
Would a work around that be to ask the old guy to resign and immediately apply so he is hired for the 20% higher position?

Reagan said: Bureaucracy is adept at protecting its nest.


I remember a former boss of mine telling me "you will never be worth more to this organization than when you were a prospective candidate outside the company".
 
Posts: 4979 | Registered: April 20, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Too old to run,
too mean to quit!
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Lord Vaalic:
So you cant be promoted more than one level... \

So if you hire a guy in at a low level, and then he is WAY over performing at that level, and you say ok he needs to be a couple levels higher. But no, you cant do that. Cant jump two levels even though they meet all of the qualifications of the higher level. All of them. So we cant promote that person, so they quit and take all of their training with them, and then you can hire some stranger in at the higher level because they are a "new" position.

STUPID

Also raises... oh no you cant give that person a 20% raise, that's too much. But you could hire in a new guy at that 20% higher salary. WTF??? If he is doing the work then give him the money. Its totally irrelevant how much he is making now, the fact is he should be at the higher pay level, and he isn't. So we can move him into the other team where the salary range is much higher, and he will be doing the same work as the others but making 15% less because otherwise its too big of a raise... So then he refuses the transfer to the team because he isn't going to do that work for less than another 20% which is very warranted for the work that will be required. So, he declines and we hire a new asshole who sucks making 30% more than the other guy, so we are spending 10% more money on a less qualified guy.

Seriously, how does HR get dressed and out of the house in the morning?

And to be a regional manager requires 8 years in the field, 2 years in the company, and a degree. But we don't have good people, or really even bad people anymore who meet that. So lets drop the experience but keep the degree requirement. And then marvel at the new guys who are flaming out a high rate because they cant handle it. Mind you, there is no degree for what we do, so they say any degree will work, so 20 years in the field is no good but a degree in French philosophy is OK with no experience whatsoever


I ran into this shit when I was in management and wanted to "exceed" HR guidelines.

I met with a couple of assholes from HR, then thanked them for their ADVICE AND COUNSEL but I was going to do it anyway. Since I was LINE management it was my prerogative. They strenuously objected. I was dealing with 1st and 2nd level management in HR. I took them to the 3 line manager who listened, then told them to make it happen. I thanked him and was leaving when he asked me to close the door.

Walking slowly so I could hear what he said, I heard him chew both their asses royally. And told them that their job was to ASSIST line management and it was line management's responsibility to see that their troops were treated fairly!!!

Other words that indicated this had better never happen again.

In short, in my world if line management wants to take personnel actions it is personnel/HR to make it happen.


Elk

There has never been an occasion where a people gave up their weapons in the interest of peace that didn't end in their massacre. (Louis L'Amour)

"To compel a man to furnish contributions of money for the propagation of opinions which he disbelieves and abhors, is sinful and tyrannical. "
-Thomas Jefferson

"America is great because she is good. If America ceases to be good, America will cease to be great." Alexis de Tocqueville

FBHO!!!



The Idaho Elk Hunter
 
Posts: 25643 | Location: Virginia | Registered: December 16, 2001Reply With QuoteReport This Post
And say my glory was
I had such friends.
Picture of Hunthelp
posted Hide Post
HR = idiots.
Just told after three months that my last day can't be my last day I work since I am taking one of my use-it-or-lose-it annual leave for the last day. Really?
Luckily, I can work from home that day. I will send an email that that day to fulfill the must provide "officially provide a service"




"I don't shoot well, but I shoot often." - Pres. T. Roosevelt
 
Posts: 1941 | Location: Chandler, AZ | Registered: June 30, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Cogito Ergo Sum
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Want to see really bad HR? Check the HR out at a pubic university with federal contracts. There are rules for the Hoi Polloi which are very different from the rules for administration. Lots of rules and no mercy.
 
Posts: 5694 | Registered: August 01, 2002Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of SIG 229R
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quote:
there is no degree for what we do, so they say any degree will work, so 20 years in the field is no good but a degree



Always made sense to me to hire a snot nose with a degree and no practical experience as opposed to a person with 10 years or so of practical exp. Never could understand that thinking!


SigP229R
Harry Callahan "A man has got to know his limitations".
Teddy Roosevelt "Talk soft carry a big stick"
I Cor10: 13 "1611KJV"
 
Posts: 6066 | Registered: March 04, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Drill Here, Drill Now
Picture of tatortodd
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Lord Vaalic:
quote:
Originally posted by dewhorse:
Yes HR can be silly and have stupid rules at times but as a person that has 50+ people working for them I love HR.

And a good HR person will help you find "work arounds" for the silliness.

HR is there for the company not the employee, as long as you remember that you will do just fine.


I don't think they are there for anyone but themselves. They exist to perpetuate their own existence, many of these policies are harmful to the company, hurt morale and create an inefficient business.
The supermajority of HR people I’ve experienced are less intelligent and less motivated than TSA employees



Ego is the anesthesia that deadens the pain of stupidity

DISCLAIMER: These are the author's own personal views and do not represent the views of the author's employer.
 
Posts: 23254 | Location: Northern Suburbs of Houston | Registered: November 14, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by Elk Hunter:

I ran into this shit when I was in management and wanted to "exceed" HR guidelines.

..........................

Walking slowly so I could hear what he said, I heard him chew both their asses royally. And told them that their job was to ASSIST line management and it was line management's responsibility to see that their troops were treated fairly!!!

Other words that indicated this had better never happen again.

In short, in my world if line management wants to take personnel actions it is personnel/HR to make it happen.


Elk, sounds like you work for a good outfit. It reminds me of a quote about JAG Lawyers. A bad one tells you not to do it, a good one tells how to get away with it.
 
Posts: 4591 | Location: Where ever Uncle Sam Sends Me | Registered: March 05, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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This is the exact reason I left the first company I ever worked for after 10yrs. Can’t move jobs unless you’ve been in role 2 years, can’t jump a job level or it might hurt someone’s feelings that have been at that level for their entire life. Lately they’ve been in the news regarding their extreme liberal stance on issues not related to their business whatsoever, weird.

Conversely I’ve been with my current company just short of two years. Identified as WAY overqualified for the job the hired me for (not overqualified for what they sold the position to be but it isn’t remotely close to that even after putting my mark on it). They put me on a few ‘secret’ projects to keep me busy and engaged for the last 9 months or so until that dried up and I (attempted to) resign to take some personal time. They asked for a week before I officially communicated my resignation, returned with a sabbatical proposal which I accepted. Came back, promoted 2 job levels and asked to lead an internal initiative not related to the promotion but to challenge my skill set and broaden my exposure. My HR contact lead the charge and was in contact with me regularly.

I guess I’m trying to say, good HR doesn’t even belong in the same functional department title as bad HR.
 
Posts: 516 | Location: Michigan | Registered: May 18, 2006Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by k5blazer:
Want to see really bad HR? Check the HR out at a pubic university with federal contracts. There are rules for the Hoi Polloi which are very different from the rules for administration. Lots of rules and no mercy.


How true!!! Worked for a while at a large liberal U, and ended up in a section where the head was a former head of HR. He was considered a terror when he was in HR. Sitting with him at section meetings was 'interesting' listening to him spout HR rules and policies, and woe betide someone cross him! He knew exactly how to exact revenge, no matter if the slight was imagined or inadvertent.


Jim
 
Posts: 1349 | Location: Southern Black Hills | Registered: September 14, 2012Reply With QuoteReport This Post
I Am The Walrus
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quote:
Originally posted by tatortodd:
The supermajority of HR people I’ve experienced are less intelligent and less motivated than TSA employees


I thought you'd have to be dead to be less intelligent and less motivated than a TSA employee...


_____________

 
Posts: 13110 | Registered: March 12, 2005Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Bought a 239 magazine for $10, got banned for free.
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It's what I call the executive mindset. Seen it everywhere that I have worked. If they think that something is a good idea it must be because they thought of it. Everyone is wrong but them.
 
Posts: 279 | Location: West TN | Registered: February 09, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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